


darling, we will never break

by goodlilbee



Series: to the sea [2]
Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Art Student Kim Hongjoong, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Kim Hongjoong is Beautiful, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Park Seonghwa is Whipped, Sad with a Happy Ending, seongjoong
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:06:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27318223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goodlilbee/pseuds/goodlilbee
Summary: It was hard. Hongjoong had moved onto the campus of his college almost six months ago now, to study what he’d been wanting to study for the majority of his years in high school - art and design. It was working out well enough for him so far; he kept on top of work and had a part-time job that paid semi-well. All was fine, all except the fact that his boyfriend of almost two years had stayed behind in their hometown, which was almost two hundred miles away, to do his own thing.-part two of "i do not fear the land, i do not fear the sea" but can be read without it.
Relationships: Kim Hongjoong/Park Seonghwa
Series: to the sea [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1993711
Comments: 1
Kudos: 25





	darling, we will never break

**Author's Note:**

> i am sorry if the end of this is rushed i really wanted to sleep but i really wanted to finish it before i slept lol
> 
> hope you enjoy~

_'cause goodbye's too strong, oh too strong a word_   
_and I'm weak from everything that I'm told._

Hongjoong was in a, seemingly unexplainable, foul mood.

He’d thought he had started this Friday evening well, feeling productive and setting out to make progress on some coursework he’d started a few days ago, which was currently mostly one colour, with a few things sketched on with pencil here and there. He’d gotten some coffee, sat down to work - but nothing had come of it. An hour later, barely any progress had been made. He lay back, flat on the floor, genuinely puzzled as to why his good mood from earlier had disappeared so quickly. There had been no inconveniences, no setbacks, nothing had actually happened that could trigger a mood as low as this. 

Having given up on trying to work out what was making him feel bad, he, still lay on the floor, reached up to his right where his phone was on a chest of drawers. He unlocked it, and saw his lock screen, which was of Seonghwa, sat in the back seat of a car, pointing a camera at Hongjoong who had taken the picture-

_Oh._

So that was where this random wave of sadness had arisen from. From him missing his boyfriend and not even realising it. Hongjoong’s already bad mood got much, much worse in what felt like an instant upon seeing the picture. Tears started to swell in his eyes but did not fall, as he slammed his phone face down on the floor and ran his hands through his hair. At first, he just felt sad, but now he also felt what could only be described as frustration.

It was hard. Hongjoong had moved onto the campus of his college almost six months ago now, to study what he’d been wanting to study for the majority of his years in high school - art and design. It was working out well enough for him so far; he kept on top of work and had a part-time job that paid semi-well. All was fine, all except the fact that his boyfriend of almost two years had stayed behind in their hometown, which was almost two hundred miles away, to do his own thing. They’d started with them each promising that they’d visit each other at least once every two weeks, be it Seonghwa visiting Hongjoong or vice versa, but things got in the way, one thing led to another and it had now been near on two months since they’d seen each other.

Sniffling, Hongjoong picked up his phone again and went to Seonghwa’s contact, almost automatically. He checked the time at the top of the screen - 6:12, he would probably still be working, but he wanted to hear his voice so bad right now that he couldn’t bring himself to care. He adjusted himself so he was sitting on the floor with his back against the chest of drawers and pressed call on the contact before he could even think of what to say. 

The line rang for around fifteen seconds, and Hongjoong became certain that Seonghwa wouldn’t pick up and it would go to voicemail. That wouldn’t be so bad, he thought, because he wasn’t calling for any actual reason in particular.

“Hongjoong?” Spoke Seonghwa, a tinge of something that sounded like worry in his voice. It made sense, as Hongjoong rarely every rang randomly, especially while the other was working. There was a lot of noise on the other end of the line - as expected, he was working.

Hongjoong tried to speak, but he simply couldn’t find the words. He had been so sure that Seonghwa wouldn’t answer his call, and that somehow made this whole situation hit his heart harder.

“Seonghwa.” He managed, choking on a sob at the latter part of the other’s name.

“Hongjoong? What’s wrong? Hang on- I’ll move somewhere quiet, just wait a sec-” Seonghwa replied, clearly having now noticed that Hongjoong was in fact, not okay right now. Less than two minutes later, any sound of commotion in the background of the call had gone.

“You still there?” Seonghwa asked, his voice quietened.

“I’m-” Hongjoong paused, trying to carefully to gather his words so he wouldn’t start crying again. “I’m sorry about this.” He responded, voice still shaking, but words still there.

“Sorry about what? What is it?”

“I shouldn’t have called while you’re working, I’ll-”

“Hongjoong,” Seonghwa replied, firmly. “just tell me what’s wrong, please. You’re worrying me.”

Hongjoong let out a deep and unsteady breath and then paused. “I miss you,” He got out, voice breaking once again. “That’s… All.” Hongjoong hadn’t noticed, but he was fully crying at this point, tears and all.

There was a long silence at the end of the line.

“I just- I was having a normal day and I started freaking out and getting upset for no reason and I didn’t know why, and then I realised it was because I missed you and I couldn’t think of what to do except call. I haven’t heard from you in… In…” He opened up the messaging app on his phone and tapped Seonghwa’s name. “Three, no, four days and it just felt weird, I feel so empty, I can’t-” He stopped to breathe, and recollect his thoughts, think of what to say next. But all he could think of was how stupid this all sounded. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have called, you can’t do anything about this right now, God, I’m stupid-” He stopped, wiping his tears away, almost frantically.

“Hongjoong… Please stop.” Seonghwa replied, finally, his voice even quieter now. “Please don’t apologise, that’s what I should be doing. You’re not stupid, that’s- this isn’t stupid at all. This is what was bound to happen…” He trailed off as if he was talking to himself. “Fuck, four days? I’m so sorry. I promised you it wouldn’t get to this, Hongjoong, God, I’m so sorry.”

Hongjoong sniffed. “It’s okay.”

“No, it’s not.” Seonghwa fired back, without hesitation. This is on me.”

Silence.

“Are you alright, my love?”

It took everything Hongjoong had to not burst out crying again at that nickname. Managing to hold himself together, he spoke. “No, not really,” His voice still shook. “I’m a little overwhelmed right now, and I just… All I want is you right now. Fuck, I need a hug.”

“I know, I know, I want nothing more than to hold you right now as well…” A long pause. “I’m so sorry. I’m still at work, and I don’t want to but I’m going to need to go… I’ll call you later, I promise, as soon as I get home, okay?” 

Hongjoong took in a deep breath. “Yeah. You should go, I’ll be alright. I’m sorry for calling.”

“Stop apologising, you’re breaking my heart, Joong. It’s fine.”

“Okay.” Was all Hongjoong could manage.

“I’ve gotta go. I love you.”

“Yeah.” Hongjoong almost whispered. “Love you too.”

The line cut off.

He immediately decided that any work he had decided he was going to get done on his coursework was not going to happen, and spend the rest of his evening watching a TV show and feeling really down about how little work he was going to get done this weekend. 

At around midnight, Seonghwa called. He stayed on the call until Hongjoong had fallen asleep.

That… Made him feel a little better.

-

_do you think of me when you look to the sea?_   
_I know it's hard to grow when you're pushed to your knees,_   
_I know our time will pass, your love here will last,_   
_darling, we will never break._

Seonghwa asked to leave work early that night. That conversation with Hongjoong leaving him feeling sick with guilt. He hadn’t seen the other in ages, and he missed him too but had been so preoccupied with work that he hadn’t come to notice. It didn’t pay well so he took on four or five shifts a week, often working past midnight. That particular shift was set to be until two in the morning, and Seonghwa knew that he just wouldn’t be able to accomplish that.

Seonghwa didn’t have any aspirations to go to college and get a dream job as Hongjoong did. All he wanted was a future with him, whatever that meant, and the only place he could start with achieving that was working his ass off and trying to save up so they could move in together. It was a hard decision to make - but when Hongjoong left to go to college, Seonghwa saw no reason to follow him. He stayed behind.

As soon as he’d got home and walked through the door of his bedroom, he’d called Hongjoong. They spoke for about two hours, Seonghwa just asking him about things that have been going on in his life, how his studies were going. They had been mid-way through a conversation about some weird housemate of Hongjoong’s and their antics when Hongjoong stayed silent for a little too long and Seonghwa concluded that he had fallen asleep. He kept the call going for another ten minutes to be sure, then ended it, whispering a “Good night” before he did.

Afterwards, Seonghwa opened up his laptop and typed in a website for train bookings, scrolling until he found the main station in the city Hongjoong’s college was. There was one at around 7am that would get him there for 10:30, which he thought seemed reasonable (It meant he would only get about four hours of sleep, but he couldn’t care).

He booked the ticket and got into bed straight away, but he couldn’t bring himself to believe that he would be able to sleep.

-

_a sound, a light that rips through the night, now too far away,_   
_but when I follow my heart, it leads me to you,_   
_and I'm weak from everything that I'm told._

Hongjoong was brewing a mug of tea when there was a knock at the door of his flat. He thought it would just be one of his housemates coming back for something, there were four of them and they had all gone away for the weekend. He left his tea to go unlock it, wondering why said housemate didn’t have their keys.

The smiling face he was met with when he opened the door was not the face of any of his housemates. There Seonghwa stood, his hair wet from the rain outside, a small suitcase by his side.

“Holy shit.”

“Hey.” Seonghwa greeted him, smiling.

“You- You’re here…” Hongjoong exclaimed as if he couldn’t quite believe it, the start of tears beginning to form in his eyes.

Hongjoong let his tears flow free, before essentially, falling forward into his boyfriend’s arms. Seonghwa caught him, wrapping his arms around him and holding him firmly. Seonghwa lifted a hand and tilted Hongjoong’s head upwards and kissed him, and Hongjoong sank into it immediately, having missed the sensation more than he could put into words. It wasn’t long before they had become a two-person pile on the floor, in the doorway of the flat, Hongjoong crying into Seonghwa’s coat, clinging onto him as if he was going to go somewhere. 

“I’m all wet from the rain” Seonghwa laughed, running a hand through Hongjoong’s hair comfortingly. “Why are you crying so much?”

At that comment, Hongjoong hit him lightly on the shoulder, not needing to explain why. Seonghwa only chuckled softly. 

They remained like that for a few minutes, before Seonghwa asked if they were going to stay on the floor, or if he was allowed in to dry off. 

Upon entering the flat, Seonghwa took off his coat and hung it on a radiator. “I’m staying until Monday night by the way.”

“ _Monday_ night?” Hongjoong called back from where he was finishing making his cup of tea on the kitchen countertop. “I have college, Seonghwa.”

“Don’t go in, you can miss one day, right?” Seonghwa asked as he walked over to where Hongjoong was stood to hug him from behind - which Hongjoong usually hated, but just this once, he allowed it.

“You’re technically not even allowed to stay here…” He had a sudden realisation. “Jesus, how did you get here so fast?” He spun around to look at him. “How much sleep did you get.”

“Not… A lot.”

“Idiot.”

“You love me.” Seonghwa declared, adoringly.

And, in thinking back to how utterly shit he felt yesterday evening due to the absence of the man in front of him, and how overjoyed he felt now he was here. Hongjoong could only agree.

“Yeah.” He took Seonghwa’s hand. “I do.”

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much for reading
> 
> -bee


End file.
